Ambivert | Hidden in plain sight

ambivert

/ˈambɪvəːt/

noun

PSYCHOLOGY

  1. a person who has a balance of extrovert and introvert features in their personality.
     

I’m sure there’s a high chance that somewhere in your life, someone asked if whether you’re an introvert or extrovert. For some, it might be easy to answer, but maybe you’ve found yourself uncertain at times. 

Your personality traits define how you associate with the world around you. Personality traits develop at an early age and are established by early adulthood. Many things about you will change with time, but your personality, at its core, will remain the same.

An extrovert is someone who receives energy from being around people. They like to be out-and-about engaging with others. They may also be called a “people person”.

An introvert is someone who receives energy from peaceful reflection. They’re happy spending time alone. Often, they need some alone time to recharge after being around a few people.

Introverts are occasionally accused of being shy or antisocial, but those aren’t introverted traits. Someone who’s an introvert may enjoy people, but prefer small groups. They’re usually not a fan of small talk, preferring deeper and more meaningful conversations.

Now we get to ambiverts

Ambiverts are right between introverts and extroverts. 

There’s a great benefit of being an ambivert. Because they don’t lean too much to either side. It can also make them highly adaptable, depending on the social situation. This allows them to connect much easier and more deeply with a variety of people. 

If there are many people, no problem, flip the switch and you’re in ‘people mode’. 

Not many faces around today? Feel like a loner? No worries, you can enjoy this alone time just as much.

There’s an incredible strength of being an ambivert. You might have natural people skills, allowing you to engage in small talk and have deep meaningful conversations, and you don’t mind being alone.

I’m sure there are many of you, after reading this, who might say “that’s exactly me!”

Just like you, I never considered myself to be either an introvert or an extrovert. I always knew I was somewhere in between, but was never sure if that was a real ‘thing’. Maybe I was just a very confused introvert. Until I stumbled upon the term ‘ambivert’ a few years ago. 

Here are a few signs that you might be an ambivert.

The ability to adapt behaviour

Adapting to the person or situation seems to come naturally to ambiverts.

Depending on the situation. Extroverts welcome small talk, while introverts will try their best to avoid eye contact in order to avoid any kind of human interaction. Ambiverts might analyse the situation depending on the person, then decide if they want to engage in the conversation or not.

I think there might be many introverts out there wishing they had the abilities of ambiverts only to have the courage and capacity to endure social gatherings.

Naturally empathetic

Most extroverts might jump right in and offer their solutions without hesitation, while an introvert might just sit there, listen, and take it all in. An ambivert on the other hand, as you might have guessed, takes a page from both books. They will listen to what’s being said, think it through and ask a few thoughtful questions in order to try and help.

Stabilizer

When there are a few introverts and extroverts at a gathering, they tend to stick to their own groups. An ambivert is usually the one who will join these two groups together. They have the ability to help introverts by making them feel comfortable by starting a conversation.

Good listener and communicator

Extroverts enjoy talking, and introverts prefer to observe and listen. Ambiverts know when to speak and when to listen.

You feel at ease in a social setting, but also enjoy your alone time

Ambiverts can feel high on life in a crowd or just enjoy a quiet evening on the couch.

Maybe a friend shows up at your house and says, “let’s go we’re going on an adventure”. Most extroverts will be out the door right away without hesitation. Introverts are likely to run away and build a pillow fort to keep these humans out. An ambivert will most probably evaluate the situation, consider the pros and cons, then make a decision. 

I’ve found that being an ambivert has helped me create a good balance in my life. Doesn’t matter what the situation, I’ll always be able to adapt to it.

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95 thoughts on “Ambivert | Hidden in plain sight

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  1. As an ENFP – I fall right on the Ambivert line. Boy, do I get what you said. I am a public speaker, a preacher to be specific. I don’t mind being in a crowd and can get overly energized by them. Yet, I love my alone time in the study when NO ONE else is around! Thanks for shedding light on us middle of the spectrum folks.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I lean towards the introverted side, but these posts definitely get somewhere in me. I am an INFJ, and I want to be with people, but I’m tired and burnt out when I am. Walking paradox, as the website Introvert, Dear says.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Nice post! I don’t know how many layers there are, but I personally always describe myself as a ‘social introvert’ 🙂 And since I’ve been starting to be completely transparent about it, I feel like I’m more accepted for who I am, and less considered as a ‘shy’ person. Did you also notice a change in how people perceive you, now that you have acknowledged being an ambivert?

    P.S. I don’t think introverts are ‘that’ passive – for example when you say that they ‘will try their best to avoid eye contact in order to avoid any kind of human interaction’. They just have a different way of being social: talking to fewer people at a party but engaging in meaningful conversations, rather than small talk. That’s how I see it!

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    1. ‘Social introvert’ is a great term. Many social introverts can easily be seen as extroverts, hence the misunderstanding of introverts and extroverts.
      Oh yes absolutely. Some people have always perceived me as an introvert and some as an extrovert. The label ‘ambivert’ has made it easier to clarify my personality and behaviours.

      Yes, what you say is very true. I was just exaggerating a stereotype to create a contrast between the two. There are many introverts with incredible social skills, and yes I do believe that introverts can engage in more meaningful conversation, but in my experience, it all depends on the person.

      I’d suggest having a look at the enneagram, if you haven’t already, to discover more about your personality. 🙂

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